“You Hurt My Feelings,” written and directed by Nicole Holofcener, is a delightful and mature comedy that delves into the complexities of relationships and raises questions about honesty, trust and communication. Starring Julia Louis-Dreyfus and Tobias Menzies, the film follows a long-married couple whose relationship is tested when the husband gives his honest opinion about his wife’s new book – to make things worse, not to her directly, she only overhears his thoughts.
Louis-Dreyfus plays Beth, a writer and teacher still struggling to find real success. Menzies plays her husband, Don, a therapist experiencing a mid-life crisis and burnout – he occasionally mixes up patients’ problems and ponders on botox. Their son Eliot, played by Owen Teague, is a young adult navigating the challenges of early adulthood. All of them are a bit stuck and lost, debating their own potential. Aren’t we all like that sometimes?
Alongside the film’s exploration of personal relationships, it daringly reflects on burning American problems such as the lack of real social safety net, expensive healthcare, and public safety. It also tackles relatable and warm situations, such as Julia’s relationship with her interior designer sister, the sister’s struggling actor husband and Tobias’ problems as a psychologist. “You Hurt My Feelings” exploration of aging, self-doubt, and the loss of faith in oneself is particularly poignant. When it comes to your opinion, do you spare the feelings of a loved one or are you honest instead? Which one is more constructive and when? And do we get defensive or can we cope if someone’s feedback is not exactly what we were hoping for? Reasonable and relatable questions. The movie does feel like a great mini therapy session for the most.
One of the early moments of brilliance in the film is when Beth says to her mom, “Maybe if dad was not only verbally abusive the book would have been a hit.” This line foreshadows the boldness of the film, it does not shy away from critiquing the entertainment industry, talk about current (destructive) trends and day-to-day struggles of creative professionals.
The cinematography by Jeffrey Waldron is stunning, with beautiful composition, natural and soft colors that create a comforting atmosphere. The script flows smoothly, and the performances by the cast are truthful. The chemistry between Menzies and Louis-Dreyfus is undeniable, and generally speaking, everyone does a great job whether they play a smaller or bigger part in the movie.
Overall, “You Hurt My Feelings” is a heartfelt exploration of love, honesty, and self-doubt. Its relatable story and concept make it a (dark) comedy for adults that has the power to spark interesting conversations in homes. It is an adorable and honest portrayal of the complexities of relationships that prove how wonderfully observant and sensitive Holofcener is.
You Hurt My Feelings is now available on Amazon Prime, Paramount+, Showtime and more.
~ by Dora Endre ~
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